Saturday, May 01, 2010

Lynette

So cancer found me kneeling by the bed
of roses in my garden - I work hard
to raise 'em just like children. Damn, you bet
I know the meaning of invasion. Yards
and families need a fence around them. So
I guard the borders, watch the exits, keep
a detailed list of things I can't control.
My Tom, he's such a softy, starts to weep
in chemo, just like when the twins were born.
As if this body were unused to wear
and tear! True beauty's baggy, loose, well-worn
with years of wash: I know. I've done my share
of laundry, felt the heat of love's machine,
the steady thump of all that's good and clean.

8 comments:

andie said...

loved the ending:

"felt the heat of love's machine,
the steady thump of all that's good and clean"

SMSteele said...

a sonnet about cancer... wow. have you seen Anne Simpson's sonnets about 9/11? they're all linked by their last line.

I think this is powerful, well written. I'm wondering if you might not name cancer until the final line. this would be the powerful "thump" of what a diagnosis actually is.

just a suggestion as are all of our comments to one another... well done

Ariel Gordon said...

I would echo sms's suggestion...

Something like "So it found me kneeling by the bed" is much more open than "So cancer..."

Though it might screw with your syllable count, I'd also take out "love" in the second-last line: "of laundry, felt the heat of the machine."

Very nice! Can't wait to see more DH poems, though I have yet to see a single episode. (Why couldn't you be writing Gilmore Girls poems, huh?)

SMSteele said...

you know, this is stunning on further reads, it has the music...

I love
My Tom...

Marika P. said...

Oh, Rebecca, I do like this. Especially the ending.

Kim McMechan said...

LOOOOOOVE!

Dawn Marie Kresan said...

Love this poem - all the rhymes and half rhymes give it lots of musicality.

Joanne Epp said...

I don't have a particular comment, just a general 'wow' about the fact that you write sonnets. Also, you give a strong sense of who this woman is.