Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Triptych

I.
It must have been
a jail indeed
to make her feel
now so free.

II.
She tried not to grow
so it wouldn't hurt as much
to be different, separate, other.
But one day
not growing hurt more.

III.
So
THIS
is what
it feels like
she marvels
to be myself,
all the time.

2 comments:

Joanne Epp said...

This is nicely concise, compact, and I wouldn't want to necessarily suggest making it longer... but you could consider using a bit more figurative language, while keeping the nice tight form.

bee said...

Hi Polly,

Some great emotional honesty in this piece. I think most of us can really relate to this.

I wonder about cutting indeed in the first stanza?

I wonder about using an image in stanza two - binding, stunting...to show how she tried not to grow? I agree with Joanne's suggestion.