Saturday, May 11, 2013
River 4
the ice on the river has cracked and floe'ed. scatter the earth. prepare the seed. dig deep. you are the plough horse. winter has rusted your flanks. winter has clanged cold the iron bit, the halter, the cultivator, the hoe. the hay had begun to mould anyway. you shake out into the prairie sun. spring's reins release you from cold quarters. to the field. to the wide open fields. "hey up," your master says. you part the old earth. there are buds now. in the willow trees.
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3 comments:
I like "you are the plough horse" but I don't know about "prepare the seed" preceding it (sure, scatter the earth and dig deep) b.c the plough horse wouldn't prepare the seed...
Love "rusted your flanks" although it is a bit of a weird thing for a horse to say/think. If a horse spoke English and had words, what would it think about the way the rippling muscles were feeling tired? idk.
Love the rest of that section.
Give your plough horse a scent, maybe?
Or wanting to taste the buds in the willow trees? Horses love eating...
this one doesn't tick me off as much, lol. Who could be angry at a horse :)
Despite your distance to my prairie, your words force me to smell my spring all over again.
I felt the last two sentences stopping me slightly. I wonder about shortening it.. buds, there in the willow tree. or something like it?
I particularly liked "clanged cold the iron bit" etc. I'm not actually sure about the literal word-sense of it, but I get a distinct sensory image from it.
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