Sunday, May 08, 2011

untitled

In Scotland, sea-side villages
full of fishermen and miserable seal-brides.
Here, were-ducks snooze
in insurance office gardens where once
there were gardeners trimming hedges
picking up
all the coffee-break butts.

In South Korea, entire days yellowed
by sand lifted from the Gobi by wind and wind and wind
and wind and dropped
on millions. Here, buses blow by,
creating curb-side simoons,
gritty instants.

In Brazil, exotics destined
for cages and corners of living rooms.
Here, rusted wrought iron full of bird
and then empty, each one a perfect mimic
of treed plastic bags
insistent ringtones
and smouldering dumpsters.

* * *

This is such a uncooperative fragment. But it's all I wrote this week. So it'll have to do...

3 comments:

m said...

I'm glad you said it was fragments, because my first comment would have been/still is that I want more. I feel like there is a slow build being created here and I do want to see where it goes.

That said, working with what you've got here, I'm unclear to what "exotics" mean in the third stanza. Exotic animals, I'm guessing, but it feels too hazy a guess.

And I don't really understand "were-duck". A play on werewolves? If so, why?

I do hope you continue to create fragments and build, build, build. I want to know where this leads.

andie said...

I like this. It feels like it is going somewhwere. (around the world?) I also like the bird a mimic of treed plastic bags insistent ringtones (not sure about smouldering dumpsters it's a great visual but how would you mimic it?) The "here" confused me in 3rd line, not sure about it.

I liked how you started the first stanza (full of fishermen and miserable seal-brides) but wasn't sure where the rest of it was going (or where the were-ducks gardeners went to)

The second stanza was an interesting vignette, rep. of wind.

Very cool. That is all.

kerryan said...

Were-ducks confused me too. And I'm not sure what you mean by "rusted wrought iron". Also, I don't get the connection between the two places in the first stanza. (the way in the second: sand/wind; in the third: birds.)

I'm not convinced about all that wind in the second stanza.

But, all that said, I like this very much and, like m, want more!